Crap I Find On Etsy pt II

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Last week, I mentioned that part of my day at work was spent finding artwork for the office. I spent about 14 hours scouring the interwebs and sites like ebay and etsy until I found this:
Basically, it matches our office perfectly as we already have one etsy artwork in this color scheme. It is also kind of nerdy, in a way- perfect for biotechnology departments. We are going to purchase three of these with dark brown or black frames and put them on our currently blank main wall across from our desks.

See! Great things can be found on etsy if you search 3 times a week for over 14 hours!

Back to the crap though, because, duh, that’s where the magic is. If you dont remember, I last assaulted you with baby leg warmers. Priceless and classy formal pageant wear for the teething set. I started off with accessories and am now moving on to my personal favorite, bags and purses (I am skipping art until I am not thankful for Etsy sellers/legit artists like the one above).

Now, I dont know about you, but when I go shopping for purses (less frequently then you think), I tend to channel my inner Rock of Love. This purse is called “Lightning Strikes,” which might explain the painful display of leather fringe dripping from all corners of this monstrosity. The neon blue and the white stars make it only appropriate if you are dressing up like a skanky Hannah Montana for Halloween, or again, that old lady from season 2 of Rock of Love (you know, the cowgirl). Shame on this creator. Even he/she/it/ugh notes that you “cant find this purse anywhere else, maybe Saturn.” It’s out of this world in such a bad way that I am not sure if the gassy, remote planet would even spit crap like this out of its many icey rings.

In case you really want to visit the rings of crazy tacky purse shopping.

Ok, now for a good purse. As you all may know, I have no sense of style but I’ve watched a ton of Clinton and Stacey antics on WNTW to know that short=small. Being short and Pooh like in build, I have learned that my body cant handle a large, Mary Kate hobo bag which is ok with me as man on corner chic never appealed to me. I do, however, adore anything in vintage style and color. When a bag is in the shade of a particular vespa I’ve been drooling over since Europe, I tend to fall in love with it instantly. I can picture myself in a white summer dress, holding on to a rugged Italian (I’ll make it Irish for B’s sake) as he races down side streets in a baby blue scooter. We stop for french onion soup and cupcakes (MY FANTASY!) at some local cafe and drive off into the sunset for our picnic by the lake/river/ocean…. ahhhhhh…

My birthday is only 8 days away…

Happy shopping, folks!

P.S. If anyone is curious as to where I got my fantasy from… just revert to what I watched before bed last night and mix it in with my variously outrageous food cravings:

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